It's Time to Go

I knew when I moved here that I would be moving away again in a short time. It suprises me to say that it is now almost to years later and I am just now moving away from my little town that I have lived in, loved in, and grown in. It is sad even more because I know in my heart that I won't ever be coming back here. In a way I am not even sure how I am supposed to be feeling. On the one hand I am so stoked to be getting out of here that I can hardly contain myself and would love to just go home, take four hours to pack, pack my car, say goodbye to the roommate I like, and hit the road. On the other hand this town has become my home, my community. I have friends all over, the checkers at the store know me by name and roommates. I have worked for half the industries here and the chinese restraunt knows my order by heart. I even get a free meal about once a month because I eat there so often. I have a spot I drive to when I need to cry (I hate crying and so therefore only do it in very private places, with two housemates my apartment does not count). I have a trail I go on to think things through and the people at the post office know me. So instead of feeling I have gone neutral. I have done this once or twice in my life and everytime I do it life just becomes a haze and one day I come out and see the world around me. Once I came out of it and lived in a new state.. that was a new expieriance. A little strange. It is more than the places I have here and teh people I know. This is such a transiant place that I never really have the same group of freinds for more than a few months. It is also just so laid back. This is a town to relax in. I think I am tired of relaxing. I need a challenge, a real challenge.